May She Be Loved.

In the cloak of night I stumble to her bed.
And in blind drunk rage I stab her and leave her for death.
For a moment feeling ecstatic and free-
Till one by one my sins encompass me.
I fall to my knees and gaze upward to heaven
Laughing hysterically as the stars tore open.
” Divine retribution.”, I scream till my lungs give out;
” Judge my sins O Father.” Blasphemy oozes from my mouth.

I turn my eyes back to my humble abode,
Where, I envisioned, my dear gasping more and more.
Hastily I make my unforgiving choice,
Leave her be, insanity overcoming every other noise.
The sky then parted and in heart rending notes, burst out crying.
And I, under the torrents, close my heart to her calling.
” Goodbye my love.” I turn to say but to my dismay,
In crazed haste I had travelled a little too far away.

A month went by followed by a year,
My sins unpunished I live in constant fear.
My deed long dead, my existence forgotten,
Yet I drown day by day waiting for death’s beckon.
In another daze of drunk debauchery,
I found myself standing in front of her cemetery.
Again I stumble down to her grave,
And in agony I pray, ” Forgive the depraved.”

Silence in answer I receive as I wait,
Staring dead eyed at the words on stone engraved.
Jane Roe “May she be loved above.” 13-12-13.
Impersonal, dispassionate, ignored and unclean.
With blurry eyes filled with repentant tears, 
I knelt down on her grave sobbing for the world to hear.
And in frantic frenzied righteous craze,
I began digging up her grave.

Covered in sweat and dying of thirst,
I finally threw up the last of the earth.
I took a deep breath and her coffin broke asunder,
In reply, that moment, the Heaven’s did thunder.
And as the rain filled the six feet gape,
I palmed my revolver and smiled at the gods’ jape.
I closed my eyes, rejoiced as my fingers tightened around the trigger-
And the world receded and disappeared, I’ll forever lay with her.